15 Reasons Why Perfectionists Have Such A Hard Time Finding Love | Thought Catalog
Dec 5, “This hurts a relationship because perfectionists will generally close off same bar that they hold themselves to, setting them both up for failure. Perfectionists point out imperfections in themselves and others, whether they say it aloud or not. But when In relationship, it can wear on you both. The more. Communication is key in any relationship. Both partners need to feel like they are heard and understood by the.
Oh, well lobbying for this approach when Perfectionists are around is a lost cause. Perfectionists always look for genuine love. They will tell you that true love do exist and what they look for is their soul mate. So they will procrastinate a bit jumping into a new relationship considering that The One will simply appear. Well, statistics say that chances to find your soul mate are 1 in 10, So yeah, maybe a good plan could overcome these odds: Perfectionists want to be in control with their lives.
They have a certain type of productive solitude.
They do exactly what they like. Admit it, even the most independent person that is part of a couple would crave from time to time for such a life. Single perfectionists cook for dinner their favorite dish without going into compromises with their significant other, they could watch Sports on TV for an entire Sunday, without asking their love if they could watch one more tennis game.
Not to mention that perfectionists could sleep as much time they want without feeling sorry that their lover will feel left behind. Perfectionists blame themselves a lot and that hurts.
Once in a while, they will look back in their life and they will discover a terrible fact. Most of their friends got married and have kids. In the average age of first marriages was Nowadays the numbers increased to Perfectionists have low self worth.
What is their biggest fear? That fear will be the Failure or being labeled as failures.
So, yes, having an ex talking around about the imperfections of a Perfectionist would be a social disaster. The end result is that a Perfectionist might consider not being prepared for a real relationship. Perfectionists easily spot incompatibility in other couples.
Each time they do that, they promise themselves not to do such a mistake and get in a relationship just for the sake of being with someone. The fact is that chances are for a couple to end up in a divorce or to succeed in marriage. So, if by Universe will a Perfectionist will get married and will eventually end in divorce, that will be the ticket to a long depression.
They will feel responsible for not making things work. Perfectionists have high standards. In US, the number of single people reached Unfortunately, Perfectionists screw it again because they are trapped in a paradox of choice. There are a lot of online dating platforms, but they fail finding love.
Because they have high standard. Most probably they end up interviewing people instead of enjoying the flow of flirting. Maybe they watched to many times Before Sunrise, so they plan long distance holidays once in a while. What happens in between? After all, who among us is perfect?
15 Reasons Why Perfectionists Have Such A Hard Time Finding Love
Perfectionism can also lead to giving up, not trying new activities or learning new skills for fear of failure. Some perfectionists would rather not try something new to avoid truly accepting their flaws. The anxiety that surrounds perfectionism can be debilitating to some.
Sufferers might experience panic attacks, irritability and depression. Their efforts to be perfect are a means to control the anxiety that results from failure. It can be very challenging for a perfectionist to face their limitations.
Perfectionism often causes conflicts in surrounding relationships. What happens when you are married to a perfectionist? When one person is easily affected by failure and has unrealistic standards for themselves, these expectations often spread to those around them. For anyone who is married to a perfectionist, think about the areas of conflict between you and your partner.
Do you feel criticized often? Does your partner express disappointment in you regularly? These can be signs that your partner is experiencing anxiety related to handing over control to you. You may argue with your partner about letting you do things your way or just give up control to avoid conflict altogether. Neither of these strategies are best for either of you long term. Your partner may become exhausted and overwhelmed by all the tasks before them and you may become resentful of their behavior.
I’m Perfect, Why Aren’t You?- Consequences Of Perfectionism On Relationships | az-links.info
On the other hand, those who challenge the perfectionism might find the conflict increasing over time with no resolution in sight. This may seem like a no-win situation for those going through it. What can be done to work through the perfectionism in the individual and as a couple?