The 6 worst reasons to stay in a relationship

6 Worst Pieces Of Relationship Advice You Should Never Ever Follow

the 6 worst reasons to stay in a relationship

The 3 Worst Reasons to Stay in Your Dead-End Relationship. Let me free you from the 07/01/ pm ET | Updated December 6, This post was. But again, it's not them you're dating, it's him, so they can't be the only reason you decide to stay. 6. He makes a lot of money. What's more important to you?. Here are 6 worst pieces of relationship advice you should never ever follow: 1. “IT'S BETTER TO STAY QUIET THAN TO MAKE EVERYTHING WORSE”.

I met a woman at a networking event who told me she was with her boyfriend for years, and wanted to know how to deal with people asking her why she's not married.

10 Worst Reasons to Stay in a Relationship, According to Science - Online Psychology Degree Guide

But that wasn't the real issue, I soon discovered. When I asked why she was staying with him, she didn't say because she loves him; she said because he'd "done nothing wrong.

This belief plays into the false idea that a breakup is a criminal indictment instead of the decision to part ways. If you aren't actively choosing this person, you're essentially rewarding someone with a long-term commitment just because he or she has committed no transgressions.

Plenty of people, in fact, choose to stay with people who do engage in less-than-good behavior. Do what you want. But stay with someone because you love and want them, not as a prize for good behavior. It's insulting -- and not enough to sustain you in the long haul.

the 6 worst reasons to stay in a relationship

I don't want to hurt her. This scenario sounds kind and considerate and sweet -- but scratch the surface and it's plain old-fashioned egotism. Because it assumes that you are the center of this person's universe and that they couldn't possibly go on without you. I learned this lesson myself when, many moons ago, I dated a guy who had relocated for me, and I knew it wasn't going to work out.

But I tortured myself before and after the breakup because I thought, OMG how is this poor fella going to move on? I'll ruin his life! My uncle, a Catholic priest who has since passed awaysaid to me the thing no one else did.

I knew my decision to end it was the right one, and if my ex wasn't thrilled with it, he was a grown up and would have to find a way to deal.

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But it wasn't until I got that much-needed slap in the face that I saw my ridiculous self-regard for what it was. Sure, it will be hard for the other person if you want out and he or she doesn't. But once you make a decision and deliver it fairly and honestly, you're not responsible for how that person recovers.

Again, if breaking up isn't a crime, then you're not a perpetrator.

the 6 worst reasons to stay in a relationship

I don't want to be alone. Let's have it out, shall we? Whether you admit it or not, ending something of your own volition and going your own way is sad and scary, for all of us -- especially when you've been with someone a while. Few people realize that by remaining in a dishonest relationship, one is doing more to harm the other than they would if they were honest and ended things. Though convenient for the inevitable downer of a day, the reality is that this has kept many people from developing emotional independence.

6 Worst Pieces Of Relationship Advice You Should Never Ever Follow

So whether a relationship is toxic or not, many people stay in unsatisfying relationships because they falsely believe that relationship or other person defines their emotions. Also, conflict-free, but emotionally void marriages are not an ideal environment either. There are some things that are unlikely to improve — especially if that improvement comes at the cost of one partner changing who they are.

Often, by the time one or both partners realize that things cannot get better, they have mutual investments, children, years of time in the relationship, or other things that make it difficult to walk away. These people find it easier, and sometimes even preferable, to remain unhappy in an unsatisfying relationship.

the 6 worst reasons to stay in a relationship

This is according to relationship therapist Richard B. Joelson in a Psychology Today article. Oftentimes, this belief stems from growing up with parents in an unhappy relationship, while in other instances, this belief comes from those who tend to avoid confrontation at all cost.

Believing that no relationship is successful often leads to settling into a partnership that is anything but.